I am so bored.
12 entries into this experiment, and I am bored. What do I write about? My work has been dull for the last several months. What do I work on? Where should my focus be right now?
I conversed with a friend over beers, and he said, “I hate being bored. I really struggle with that. What do you do when you are bored?”
What do I do when I am bored? I have been thinking about that conversation for the past couple of weeks. I think a better question is: Why are we so afraid to be bored?
When we are bored, it really means we don’t like being with our own thoughts. We have to find something to focus on to avoid being with ourselves. Instead of looking inward, we fill the void with social media, video games, social events, or that new Netflix show everyone has recommended.
Speaking of being bored, have you ever noticed that TV shows always end up being talked about when you are at a social event and the conversation is getting too stale or boring. Try and be aware of that the next time you are out to dinner with friends. TV shows and movies come right before the check comes out.
Digressing, we are afraid to be bored. We are afraid to admit that activity does not mean progress. As the sun rises later and sets earlier, the dark creeps into the mind rapidly. There is something scary but meaningful about the seasons bringing about introspection.
Where I live, it is about to start raining pretty heavily for the next three days. It seems like more time inside, oh no. Boredom.
There is an old Navajo Chant that goes:
I follow the scent of falling rain
and head for the place where it is darkest
I follow the lightning
and draw near to the place where it strikes
The next time you find yourself alone, go into the darkness instead of running and hiding. Don’t judge your thoughts; watch them closely. Question your ideas, your anxieties, your beliefs. Be aware of what you spend a lot of time thinking about when you are alone. Take out a journal and write some things down.
I like to organize my thoughts using the framework Naval Ravikant discussed: “A fit body, a calm mind, a house full of love. These things cannot be bought—they must be earned.”
My writing is blocked out in sections of:
Health (Physical) - Am I exercising and eating well? How can I be better?
Health (Mental) - How peaceful am I? How are my thoughts when I am bored? Reassuring or doom-like?
Love and relationships - Am I checking in on my partner and friends? Am I being present around them and showing them true love.
Career and Material Wealth: Does my work still feel like play? Do I obsess over this even when I am bored? Are there other opportunities out there?
I would also like to add a "Fun" section because you shouldn’t take yourself or life too seriously. What trips do you have coming up? What would you like to plan or do for fun over the next 6-12 months?
Life should be fun and happy, or what is the point? You don’t want to spend your days being miserable all the time. You don’t want to spend your moments in boredom in misery, either. So when it is dark and silent this coming winter, follow the lightning and draw near to the place where it strikes.
What does your heart say when you are bored? What gets you excited? What or who should you stay away from? How can you gain some perspective? Watch the mind.
Boredom is good. Again, never mistake activity for progress. Rest is good. Be like a lion, not like an ant.
My work has been boring, so my focus has shifted to the other buckets of my life (my new son, my health, travel, research, and some fun). Sometimes, boredom allows you to pick up the pieces of things you might have left behind.
Yet, even when bored with my work, I still spend all day obsessing over it. I love being in the investing and trading market. I love the research, the game, all of it. That is my lightning strike. I also spend a lot of time thinking about this Washed Up blog, writing about it, and turning it into a book. Signal. Do stuff you are deeply curious about, even in the depths of boredom and uncertainty.
Boredom might help you recognize you need to change. Depression can overwhelm you in these times of boredom. I know because it does to me. And I say, “Not today, Satan!”
I love Jim Carrey's thoughts on this:
Your body needs to be depressed. It needs deep rest from the character that you've been trying to play.
As I wrote about in Ride The Wave, you are washed up on a new shore, a new beach, a new situation, a new life journey with new people, and it is finally time to dust yourself off and find the next wave.
You don’t want to look back on your life, escaping your own thoughts and boredom, never finding the place where you were meant to be. Yeah, you might work hard, build the house, get the fancy car, and collect all the material things that stoke the ego. Yet, someday in the future, you will leave it all behind. This is the slavery of our generation. A generation scared to stop for one fucking second and look inside to find the light.
-Molesy